a few days ago i spoke with an american (in person) for the first time in nearly two months. it was an eleven year old girl from spain who has lived in the US for two years. so i wouldn't even say 'american' but while speaking with her, without previous knowledge, it would have fooled me. but how insightful, what a relief that i didn't even know i needed, if even for just a moment. her intonation. the pragmatics. proxemics. pauses. the rhythm. gestures. the closure. these are things i never totally took notice or made an account of when speaking at home. though all of my friends from spain are fluent in english, these are things i never noticed that they lack. i am completely comfortable speaking with them and never feel the need to alter my vocabulary or simplify my sentences. but these are moments in which culture and language are intertwined. and while they are fluent in english, they will never be 'culturally' american neither will i ever be 'culturally' spanish. and even if i became as fluent as i could ever possibly become, these small but so obviously different cultural aspects reveal everything i could never hide
dammit! i want to live every culture and every language wholly