people are always trying to find someone to make their worries and stresses worth it and it shouldn't be so. you should make your worries and stresses worth it yourself,

and then perhaps if you're lucky you can be happy with another person.

happier than i have been for so long. i've been happy for so long. beautiful beautiful life.

i want someone with curiosity. i've a curiosity for everything. it's weird at times but how can you learn otherwise.

wish people'd stop settling. i'm exactly where i want to be and heart, mind, curiosity all content.

i don't know what love is, but i know what it isn't

let's get married, I'm serious, but only for the citizenship, i've always liked the idea of it. a relationship that doesn't lie about its intentions and shit.

På Konungariket Sverige

if you need me i wont be here so don't need me
jag lämnar för sverige i tolv timmar. jag vet inte hur jag kommer att sova i natt.

I've never laughed so much.

På Sverige

I imagine myself listening to Kent on the airplane to Sweden. And it's weird as hell, you know, because right now, the words are just pretty, like, noises or whatever.  And I can enjoy it all the same. But I keep thinking about how on the way home in January I'll listen to the same songs or whatever, and I'll know what they mean and it'll never be just noises anymore, you know? It's like the end of an entire portion of my life and the beginning of something incredibly new.  And it's so strange, because I'm not only going to learn another whole language to express myself in, but I'll learn so much from the beautiful people around me and all the cities and culture I'll get to experience. I know this idea could be written so much more eloquently and poetically but honestly I'm anxious as hell and can barely form a sentence at the moment. I'm going to enjoy those noises while I still can.

i'd be nothing without you my darling please don't ever leave

is there a human alive ain't looked themselves in the face without winking or saying what they mean without drinking

who will believe in something without thinking, "what if somebody doesn't approve"

is there a soul on this earth that isn't too frightened to move?

Moon Palace page 299

"I'm sorry I had to tell you. But I wouldn't have felt right if I hadn't called."

"No, I'm glad you did. It's just so hard to take. Oh God, M.S., if only you knew how long I'd been waiting to hear from you."

"I've made a mess of everything, haven't I?"

"It's not our fault. You can't help what you feel, no one can."

"You didn't expect to hear from me again, did you?"

"Not anymore. For the first couple of months, I didn't think about anything else. But you can't live like that, it's not possible.  Little by little, I finally stopped hoping."

"I've gone on loving you every minute. You know that, don't you?"

Once more, there was a silence on the other end, and then I heard her start to sob again--wretched, broken sobs that seemed to suck the breath out of her.  "Jesus Christ, M.S., whar are you trying to do to me? I don't hear from you since June, and then you call me up from Chicago at five o'clock in the morning, tear my guts out with what happened to Sol--and then you start talking about love? It's not fair. You don't have the right to do that. Not now."

"I can't stand being without you anymore. I tried to do it, but I can't."

"Well, I tried to do it, too, and I can."

"I don't believe you."

"It was too hard for me, M.S. the only way I could survive was to make myself just as hard."

"What are you trying to tell me?"

"It's too late. I can't open myself up to that anymore. You nearly killed me, you know, and I can't risk anything like that again."

filling the moonwell

negating the laws of gravity

oh, you are the roots that sleep beneath my feet and hold the earth in place

you will realize that this is where the journey starts.

you lost your maps
they lost their anchor to post modernism.

my fingers
and lungs
stuck in
the fogbank




all the eyes look like yours
you live on the surface of a planet in a solar system and galaxy of millions.
we're all merely a billion chemical reactions.