THE END

reality has come too soon. i love you all. thank you for being a part of my life these past six months. it was incredible. i have no words to express how grateful i am for what i've experienced in sweden. i'm not even sure what i've experienced. maybe in a year i can comment and reflect on how it was, but it's impossible now. i just lived the best months of my life. i formed a family from all over the world. there are a number of clichés i could use to sum it up like "unforgettable" "experience of a lifetime" "this changed my life" and though they are all true, the experience was anything but cliché. "maybe we'll see each other again. but just maybe." but maybe not. and certainly we'll never all be together again. nevertheless this was the most wonderful and beautiful experience, and perhaps it's even more special because it was so fleeting. and it was about living so deeply something unique all together and being the only ones who could ever understand it. tack så mycket everyone, i will miss it so much.

DON'T THINK THAT I'M PUSHING YOU AWAY WHEN YOU'RE THE ONE THAT I'VE KEPT CLOSEST

so starts the last ten days of my life in stockholm. the beginning of the end.  i haven't slept alone in over a month and my room has slowly but surely become hotel katie. last night, hosting four in total. two mattresses on my floor and a sassy martín alone in my bed.  alarms at 9am, hair for breakfast. i'm feeling a bit sad now but it's o'cake.  i'm posting a photo because for me it feels i have completely changed. the other day i thought how it will be to go home and how different things will be there and how i'm curious about what it's like there now.  but of course it is the same as i left it.  i am the one who's changed and the time here passes faster than the time at home but at the same time has much more depth.  i met all the most wonderful people and formed a family from france, italy, and spain.  it feels as if i've lived an entire life's worth here and that i am completely a different person. so in this photo, i look the same.  i don't feel the same.  but i guess that is the best kind of different.